Talk about whatever you want to here, but stay correct
#326492 by Erotic Delivery
Wed Apr 28, 2021 1:13 pm
Hi everyone! I'm having a manic epsidoe which must mean its time for me to post here. couldnt figure out my old account login so i made a new one, probably for the best but its me nathan_lol.I come to share my new album which is very dev heavy:

https://nathangilbert.bandcamp.com/album/bstarro

its like a playlist of musical white noise made by an AI that's also God. It's dense with information like jazz and it took longer to bounce than to create. I'm also not done, it's what im calling a Lifetime Album in that I will add tracks to it for the rest of my life. So please check it out, ive already had 3 sales which is making me cry, i have never made money off my music before.

this might be my favorite forum, nowhere else has been for "fourm"ative for me. i wasnt lectured by devin townsend on 5/8 after all
#326505 by Erotic Delivery
Sat Nov 13, 2021 4:30 am
That dogshit "album" represents the last episode that broke me. I'll have more but never again will they impact my family or my own executive function. I'm fucking done. Do not click the link, but I'm never taking the album down.

My entire life I've tried to wrestle with the infinite. Or God or Satan or whatever. Things beyond things. But i'm just tired now. I tried everything to cope with It. Therapy, drugs, prescribed drugs, volunteering, shit relationships, everything. But then it hit me out of nowhere, clear as day.

Why?

Why run away, when I can just walk away? It's always there anyways, I might as well fucking slow down. Since I realized that, life has gotten so much easier. I've found peace with things that used to keep me up vomiting. I can go to Wal-Mart without getting overwhelmed by color and decision. I'll catch myself singing along to the radio. I want my enemies to be happy. Shit like that.

Since my last post, my life has gotten so much better. I won't bore you with the details, but I finally found The One after 27 miserable years (big surprise, shes always been around me) and I live a life closer to what my 16 year old self would want for me. I've been through things that people have killed themselves over and come out stronger. Eye for an eye, I survived. And if my life goes according to plan, I will soon be a husband and hopefully a father.

This is it, isn't it? This is Love. Real Love. This whole time, Devin's music was just helping me get ready. My last "hey this forums still here damn im doing better than I was" post from 2017 feels identical to what I feel now, but I don't even remember posting it. So just, enough. I made my bed. I've made some preparations. I'm older now, but it's ok. I'm ready.

I got home today from work and spent 4 hours writing a song for my wife. It's the same song that's been in my head my whole life. They all are. The music is flowing now faster than I can get it into a scratch track. I'm not scared of my brain anymore. I'm just now learning how to properly use it. And if I fully think about what my gut is pushing my brain to do I almost pass out. I've spent my entire life hovering around music like a scared bee, hesitant towards the only thing keeping him alive. But why?

anyway, this forum is too slow for me to remember to check it, but if anyone ever wants to just chat i fuckin love hearing from internet people, i always learn something new about a new country or something. and if youre on the devin townsend forums an reading this far into my dumbass post chances are we'd have a nice chat so my email is nathangilbert00@gmail.com

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Google [Bot] and 8 guests