I think I can (somewhat) see where you are coming from, Falk. Short story: I grew up with my stressed out mum, who always assumes the worst thing will happen (probably as a result of my dad dropping dead on the kitchen floor one morning when I was 4). I've never had the greatest social skills, and I became too dependent on my friends. Also, I worry about everything :p

I don't want to tell you what to do... but for me, moving worked. In fact, I moved twice. First time around I moved to a folk high school (kind of like a fun boarding school), where you HAVE to socialize to get by. Then I decided to leave Norway, both by travelling and eventually moving to London.

Also: what Octillus and JuZ said.
It can be isolating to move somewhere new... but it's also liberating... making it less scary to try new things. </rant>

[JuZ]

A simplified summary:
Disabled person speaks to me for nearly an hour. In all that time, I speak for maybe three minutes.
In all that time, I barely resolve the issue at hand, and am accused of being responsible for the faults of others, of being insensitive to the disabled and the clinically depressed, and of wasting this person's time.

FACT: I called them with intention of a short and sweet resolution. I have given them the solutions they needed to hear. I displayed infinite fucking patience and did not once contradict their accusations of insensitivity as I know damn well about depression and the needs of disabled people. And still, I was made the villain.
I will show sympathy to a disabled person, but I fucking hate it when they use it as an excuse to lay blame unfairly, treat me like shit, and not let me have my say and answer their goddamn questions.



If you don't work in complaints, be thankful.

Disabled arseholes are still arseholes, of that there can be no doubt!

Working in complaints would be very tough, I would imagine.

"Dear Friends,
Levon is in the final stages of his battle with cancer. Please send your prayers and love to him as he makes his way through this part of his journey.

Thank you fans and music lovers who have made his life so filled with joy and celebration... he has loved nothing more than to play, to fill the room up with music, lay down the back beat, and make the people dance! He did it every time he took the stage...

We appreciate all the love and support and concern.

From his daughter Amy, and wife Sandy"

Sucks.

Sad indeed.

[JuZ]

Damn, had no idea.

First world family problems. Feel free to skip this one, but I need to vent.
I have three sisters, two of which are a few years younger than me, and the third from my stepfather who is 17 years younger than me. Now before she was born and before we all moved to Melbourne, my sisters and I grew up in less than ideal conditions. When we moved here, we were hoping the conditions would change.

Fast-forward over 12 years and nothing has changed at all. Our youngest, who is now eleven, is growing up in a similar environment with our loving but slightly crazed mother and her lazy, slovenly father. One of my other sisters, closest to my age and similar in neurosis, has decided to go to their house and clean up her room. I agreed to help. Our other sister backed out at the last second, as she did not want to get involved. Typical.
Anyway, we come over and for three hours clean as much as we can. Sorting through and throwing out things that my little sis collects but doesn't need, cleaning up stuff she writes on the wall instead of in a notebook, vacuuming, the works. By the end, she pretty much hated us and thought we were mean (me less as I go a bit easier on her). Our mother comes in after coming home from work, and gives something of a thank you, but as usual a fight erupts between her and my (elder) sister because those two seem to forever be at each other's throats.

We both leave, and I let her vent while we head to my place. I frequently allow her to vent as she needs to get it off her chest, but today I made my point known that while I appreciate that she resents our mother for going into the same habits that we were brought up in, and she hates that our youngest is growing up with similar problems, I am not going to take personal sides between their arguments.
Our mother needs to pull her thumb out and become more assertive at home. Leave our stepfather if that's what she wants. Okay. You, sis, need to lighten up or just flat out say "no" to their attempts to exploit you because you are their most convenient point of assistance if that's what you want.

It's a slight joke that I was the smart one for moving further away from my parent's house and have little to do with my family except when I wish to see them. Today it brought forth that serious reality. It also made me look around my place and think "well shit, guess I need to clean up too, or call myself a hypocrite."
Sometimes it's best just to stay away. Maybe other sister who backed out might be lazy, but she knows a potential domestic when she sees one. Rant over.

Forgive me if I've got this wrong; but your mum's letting your step-sister live in squalor? There isn't really an excuse, I knew kids at school who's homes resembled rubbish tips, mother buried somewhere within the hoarding of junk on a sofa with a towering ashtray full of fag-ends watching Sky One all day while a dog shat around her feet on newspapers laid out for that very purpose. Meanwhile both my parents worked long hours, but that doesn't mean I was raised not knowing how to use a fucking vacuum cleaner. As a result, some the ones I still keep in contact with don't seem to have changed their living habits (one of them a few years ago even joked about a food stain on her bedroom wall that had been there for years...the fuck is wrong with that bitch? Scrub it off!!!), yet I'm the mental one for putting the curtains in the washing machine, shampooing the sofas, bleaching the carpets and chucking caustic chemicals down the sinks every 6 months. My friend's sister had a baby a few months ago and she lives with their mum who's flat is just...fucking gross. I suggested to him that I went in and cleaned the place top to bottom so it'd be a better environment for the baby; but...she'd probably see it as an insult. I mean...most people have nail clippings on their coffee tables and cat hairballs matted into the rugs, right?

What's un-awesome is people who assume they can get stuff for free because they see other people having it. Some woman I know went on a hissy rant about the photographer of the band I went to see on Monday cause it's apparently his fault she couldn't go to the show as he's never given her a lift home from a show, but always offers me one despite him living nearer to her than me. (remember, this is London, not the Andes.) This then escalated into a bitch about his lifestyle, because he has a big house, couple of classic cars, self employed etc. the she started on the fact that I get guestlisted, drinks bought for me and the odd free shirt, even though I can afford it and she can't because she's unemployed...so what though?
When she finished I kindly explained that if that's the attitude she has about myself a friend of mine of 9 years, then she should possibly take a step back and wonder why she never gets anything. Mental woman.
I'm so pissed off, I just proof-read that and I still can't make any sense of it...OH WELL PONYO'S ON TELLY.

You bleach carpets?

[Octillus]

MUST RESIST OBVIOUS JOKE

You bleach carpets?

You can buy carpets you can bleach, yes. And sometimes people don't know how to take their shoes off...

Lettuce, you are correct in your impressions from my post (except she's my sister in the sense we share the same mother, but oh well).
My stepfather would be the one sitting around watching TV all day, smoking and leaving butts, ashes, and chocolate wrappers lying around, making more mess than mess gets cleaned, and expects the rest to do something about it.
It's not entirely my mother's fault, but she allows it to happen, which drives the rest of us nuts. It's the main reason for the aforementioned arguments that she lapses into this mentality that nothing will ever change, no matter what she tries. How ironic she is a nurse for disabled people and cleans up after them (proficiently, I might add).
I'm not going any further with this, because if I do, I'll just be sharing my life story, in full depressing detail, and I'd rather not dump that shit here.

A choir gig today and we have like three times more songs than what we usually have, plus a 3hour reherseal before. This is gonna be embarrasing.

^ Typical nurse, not matter where do you live it's the same. Their husbands are usually alchoholics, drug addicts or whatever who has problems.

Guess what my wife's profession is.

[Octillus]

Saying goodbye to the folks that you actually kinda like before you move 3,000 miles away.


Got a big hug from someone I was involved with a few years ago, who is actually honestly dear to me, even though you know, life takes you down different paths. It was the first of many bittersweet actual goodbyes.

It's always absolutely crushing when a buddy moves away, especially when it's not an easy place to visit (a 6 hour train journey is one thing, but cross-Atlantic is another)
You got a whole new life ahead of you though, you'll look back with fondness but know it was the right thing to do.

^ Typical nurse, not matter where do you live it's the same. Their husbands are usually alchoholics, drug addicts or whatever who has problems.

Yeeeeeah one of my mates is a mental health nurse, I'm pretty sure HE doesn't have an alcoholic husband.